Dear Dr. Sophronia,
In response to our recent phone conversation, I offer you this challenge: Find a study which shows Muslim children are
harmed by growing up in multiple partner families, or else admit that your aversion to multiple partner families is
based merely on social / religious prejudice.
Citing studies that children are harmed by being in a series of broken homes is not even remotely related. I have little reason to doubt such studies of broken families are correct in their conclusions.
When you tell people who are not biologically destined to be monogamous (i.e. who are not born with the gene that codes for the monogamy hormone), that they must be monogamous, you are condemning them to a marital path doomed to failure, as the recent Swedish study shows. You are insuring more broken homes, and more damaged children. In short, your social / religious prejudices are doing real harm to families.
As you pointed out, the tide is turning for gays. More states are legalizing gay marriage, and India just decriminalized gay love. As more people realize that being gay is a biological destiny, more people will examine their own biological destiny, thus hopefully there will be less families that end because a spouse finally realizes s/he is gay. Hopefully there will be fewer gays driven to despair or even suicide because social / religious prejudices unfairly ostracized them for being born biologically different from heterosexuals.
Polyamory has not yet gotten as far as gay love. If you can turn up evidence Muslim children are harmed by growing up in multiple partner families you may be able to show this is justified. Otherwise polyamory is the next frontier on which the battle for sexual equality will be fought. Hopefully the harm done to polys and their families by the social / religious prejudices you espouse will one day end, and families will stop being broken up merely because one spouse or the other finally admits s/he is not biologically capable of monogamy.
I know you dispute this; well then prove Muslim children raised in Muslim cultures are harmed by growing up in multiple
partner families, or else stop harming your students by inflicting your polyphobic bigotries on them. In your last
e-mail you claimed, "None of my teaching involves Christian doctrine," but if you disparage poly families without
evidence, it appears to me that in subtle ways you do, e.g. perhaps one day you'll be saying, "Back in my day
we called that promiscuity... but that was because we were blinded by cultural / religious prejudices which this
sociology course may help you learn to overcome."
In that e-mail you also said, "I'm a celibate nun..." If I didn't try to rescue you from your self imposed
nunnery, I'd be neglecting my responsibilities as a boyfriend. As to your claim that, "Polyamory will lead to short
lived relationships," the fact that we've sustained a relationship for over 45 years amply refutes this.
What monogamous man have you had a relationship with for that long? Our relationship has been clearly polyamorous
because we've both dated others the entire time. The fact that you claim to have been looking for a monogamous man
doesn't refute that our relationship meanwhile has been polyamorous. You're in denial about this, just as you're in
denial that polygamy was not only the biblical norm, but was completely approved by Jehovah.
Polyandrously yours,
Flash
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